LOLitics, 2022

[kateoftheangels]

Like many Brit and Brit-adjacent people in fandom, I’m not above dealing with the crapstorm that is UK politics these days by shipping it.

There’s nothing quite like deeply flawed politicians actually being human and caring about their country and also having it off with each other, even though in reality it’s overwhelmingly likely that they’re total wankers with no redeeming qualities and aren’t even getting their kink on in Westminster. LOLitics is an improvement on RL, is my main premise…

…Anyway, the big news on the LOLitics and UK politics front is that Boris is finally gone, after a combination of Partygate and backing an abuser and the “Darwinian” Parliamentary system (and a characteristic “It’s not me, it’s you!” farewell speech).

Which means my darling Daddy Starmer is suddenly up to bat! Admittedly, he’s doing reasonably well, and suddenly I have some guilt regarding my prurient interest in this poor man, who is just trying to do his best for the country, and his potential underground life as a kinky dom out to spank his political opponents into submission…

Watch on YouTube

…all right, possibly not that last part. At least not literally.

ETA: I was going to say that there was sadly no fic! But there is in fact some now <3

Here’s the opportunity, Sir Keir! The UK is counting on you to rise manfully to the task, etc.

Comments

[vysila]

OMG, lolitics is fabulous! I love this and think it is a fantastic response to the usual idiocy of politics, even if the UK version of idiocy is much more reasonable than the US-grown variety.

[kateoftheangels]

Heh, LOLitics is indeed fabulous, and actually some of the fic is fantastic - - in New Labour’s heyday, the juggernaut ship Tony Blair/Gordon Brown had some really excellent writing (they also have a canon romantic breakup as dramatised in this show starring Michael Sheen). And, yes, the UK political idiocy isn’t quite as idiotic (or orange) as the US grown one, but that is an extremely low bar …

[grondfic]

Sadly, Boris is NOT YET gone. He's offered to resign .... sometime in the future .... when there's a successor. Under normal protocol, Dominic Raab the Deputy PM SHOULD be caretaking whilst the Tories decide (in their endless fashion) who will be the next PM. But Boris doesn't play by the protocols - and WILL NOT go until his successor is announced. Current number of possible successors - minimum 9 or 10 (and they've just started a Gender-wrangle between themselves, plus an argument on who is Woke and who isn't ...)

SO ... no end is in sight yet for Boris' premiership. BUT - he's a lame duck PM who can't instigate any new policies, leading a caretaker Cabinet of his particular cronies.

Therefore, lolitically: if Sir Keir is pining to beat someone into submission, he should still practise his techniques on Boris, whilst checking out the credentials of the leading candidates for the Tory leadership. Personally, I'd advise him to look carefully at Tom Tugendhat, a seasoned ex-army MP with zilch experience as a government insider (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Tugendhat). A possibility if the Party wants someone fresh but with a knowledgeable eye on - say - a possible war-situation in eastern Europe.

[kateoftheangels]

Yes, the Boris Johnson Show does seem to be heading into a fifth act, as it were, or into extra time, doesn’t it? Alas for the country, really, but when has our man ever been interested in doing the right thing.

That said, you’re right that Daddy Starmer ought to be considering his next opponents, lolitically speaking. Tugendhat does seem a likely candidate: less noxious and corrupt than the others, and admittedly quite easy on the eye. Thank you for bringing him to my attention! I shall watch his career, and his kinky subbing potential, with interest.

[grondfic]

Hot off the press!!!

There's an 11th candidate - doesn't stand an earthly, but he's the prettiest yet (and *sob* used to be Labour according to the Daily Mail).

So here's the Member for Gillingham and Rainham - Rehman Chishti (No. 3 on this handy list of candidates from the Guardian): https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2022/jul/10/conservative-leadership-candidates-the-runners-and-riders-in-full

[kateoftheangels]

He is pretty. And, actually, he sounds quite well meaning. I wonder what it would take to lure him back to our side? It does sound like a job for Daddy Starmer…!

[grondfic]

Sadly, following today's electoral deadlines, there are now only 8 candidates going forward, and pretty Rehman isn't one of them. Tom Tugendhat, however, HAS made the first cut and is beginning his pitch for power in earnest.

It was great fun seeing Larry the cat on tonight's news, apparently stealing a photo-op and showing off his tummy. Larry for PM, I say! He's been at No. 10 far longer than some of the other candidates.

Oh well, on to chapter two now.

[kateoftheangels]

Oh well, that was short-lived. Hopefully pretty Rehman will continue to plough the furrow and water the fields, and we will get to see Tugendhat’s successful, and if not, at least entertainingly hot, run :-)

Larry the cat is the best thing about No. 10!